Yoga and a Pineapple

Two major events yesterday: yoga with the most difficult instructor on post and a pineapple purchase at the grocery store. You know, I love fresh pineapple but never bothered to purchase one because I had no idea how to cut the thing up. Well, yesterday I got brave because I have a little more time on my hands these days. I am still uncertain of how to choose one that is ripe (I intend to look up this tidbit of information). My plan was just to select one that looked intact and dry. The bottom of the pile had been moisture soaked and looked too mushy for my taste. It takes me a little while to select anything at the grocery store. To me, fruits and vegetables are expensive. I want the best taste for my dollar. I don't know who these fools are that just walk right up, toss some stuff in their plastic bag without looking, and move on. I do know that they are invading my space and distracting me by reaching over my selection pile without even so much as an "Excuse me". Everytime this happens, I wish them a silent hex of a bruise spot or a piece of flavorless produce. You must know what I am talking about, though. Those people that are hell on wheels with a shopping cart. They'll run you over without even knowing what's happened. These people, I imagine, would "throw bows" to get down the aisles in record time. Personal space is no issue because it's like they don't even see the other shoppers. Anyway, I prefer to take my time, select what I think is best, and move on...no matter how many times I am interrupted by one of these grocery shopping heathens.

Once I had the pineapple selected, I strolled away, proud that I had dared to take on the challenge of slicing and dicing that armored exterior. After several more aisles of elbow nudging and budging (I don't practice these acts, I am, of course, referring to others), I was free. Groceries inside, cool stuff unloaded and put away first like mom taught me, I was ready to tackle it. That pineapple stared me down, daring me to take it to the cutting board. Moving closer to it, I noticed an amazing thing that a more observant person may have discovered at the store. All brands may not be alike, but this glorious pineapple had a valuable piece of information zip tied to its crown, if you will. Crown, being the correct terminology, came from the oh-so-infomative tag dangling by the plastic tie. Step by step, there it was. Just like that, I had the key to successful pineapple butchering right there on the pineapple all along!

Now with the later challenge, yoga, I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. This woman that teaches is from planet flexible and seems oblivious to the fact that others are not. She contorts herself into a pretzel and then looks out at the class like "Come on guys, let's all do it". If only it were that easy. I go because I want to get better. Oh, and also because once when I commented that her class was difficult she replied, "Yeah, it's not for begginers". To me, she might as well have said, "You need to go somewhere else because you're not as advanced". Well, ha, yeah right, I am of course showing up for your class now, and I will get better to spite you. Even though, logically the only one I am hurting is myself (I mean literally, physically experiencing discomfort). At least I know I am not the only one. Last night I was across from two girls that appeared to have never experienced this instructor before. Maybe never even experienced yoga. I looked over at them from time to time, when they dropped their arms from a pose, sighed a loud defeated sigh, and collapsed into child's pose for the remaining sets of a series. I have come to find that my favorite poses are cat, cow, and child's pose...the poses that cause the least amount of physical pain.

I guess I keep going because the physical demand of it is a distraction. Also, the emphasis placed on breathing gives you little time to think about anything else. A break from my thoughts, from my brain's rapid fire approach to any and all situations, is nice. My favorite part, one of the other main reasons I attend with this instructor, is her relaxation period at the end. She basically guides us through meditation where "all of our worries and stresses of the day are to be let go". Systematically she commands us to relax each part of bodies and sink deeper and deeper into the mat. I like the key phrases like "Feel each breath massage your heart". I am thinking to myself at this point, "I know this is not possible, but I will allow myself to imagine this breath coming in with tiny fingers and working on my heart muscle, how delightfully ridiculous".

At the end of the day, I know I have not moved mountains or done anything miraculous. It is the sheer act of enjoying each moment and finding humor in it that is the accomplishment. Oh, and I am writing again. Feels good to be back.